The Power of Words and Prayer

How Your Mind Shapes Your Reality

When life throws its hardest challenges at you—those moments when problems hit with the force of a Valencian thunderstorm against terracotta tiles—I've found two powerful tools that have changed everything for me: the right prayer and the right words.

After 47 years of walking this earth (many of them spent watching the Mediterranean sunset from my terrace), I've learned that what we tell ourselves shapes our reality more profoundly than almost anything else. Let me share what I've discovered.

The Prayer That Reduces 80% of Inner Suffering

Have you ever noticed how much of our suffering comes from trying to control things we simply cannot change? This realization hit me one evening while sharing a bottle of Rioja with my oldest friend in Barcelona. We concluded that:

80% of life's suffering comes from confusing what depends on us and what does not.

The remaining 20%? It comes from allowing what does depend on us to remain unchanged.

When troubles arrive—whether it's a layoff from work, a relationship ending, or any of life's many disappointments—we tend to grip our pain tightly, like the last anchovy on a plate of tapas. We refuse to let go of what was, desperately hoping to resurrect a past that's already sailed.

This is precisely when an ancient prayer, attributed to philosopher Reinhold Niebuhr, becomes invaluable:

"God grant me the stillness to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the ones that I can change, and the wisdom to recognize the difference."

I carry these words written on a small card in my wallet, nestled between my DNI and my health card. It's become my lifeline when storms arrive.

Accepting What We Cannot Change

Most frustrations arise from wanting to change immovable circumstances. Creating distance—what I call momentos de reflexión—helps us see situations clearly and accept reality as it is.

Accepting your circumstances doesn't change them, but it certainly makes them better:

• Once you accept a job loss, you begin reinventing yourself professionally

• Once you accept a divorce, you join the gym (and perhaps Tinder, why not?) and increase your chances of finding new connection

Wise advice: Let the old boat sink. Look for a new and better one.

The Words That Changed Everything

There's a bone-chilling story by Mark Twain that perfectly illustrates the second lesson I want to share.

In The Prince and the Pauper, Twain tells of a boy trapped in London's slums, suffering daily beatings and hunger. After hearing tales of princes from an old priest, the boy begins dreaming every night of castles and royalty. Though he wakes to the same grim reality each morning, something gradually changes.

He starts adopting the gestures and dignity from his daydreams. His friends, fascinated, begin treating him as if he were truly a prince.

One morning, instead of begging in his usual streets, his steps guide him to Westminster Palace, where he comes face-to-face with an actual prince. When they exchange clothes, the prince remarks on their identical appearance—the only difference being their garments (or what they told themselves).

Your Thoughts as Arrows

Your thoughts are arrows. What you repeatedly tell yourself eventually materializes.

Imagine shooting arrows at a target: persist long enough, and you'll eventually hit the bullseye. Your mind works the same way with thoughts—they're arrows aimed at either a bright or bleak destination.

This is both blessing and curse, because your thoughts can build castles or dig abysses.

Reprogramming Your Mind

"The difference between the right and almost right words is the difference between lightning and a firefly." – Mark Twain

Like many of us living along the Costa del Sol, I've had my share of reinventions. When I began writing, I nearly surrendered to negative self-talk: "There's too much competition," "No one makes a living from this," "ChatGPT will replace writers."

But I decided to rewrite my internal script with more positive, courageous words. These slipped into my subconscious like they did for Twain's beggar.

And something magical happened:

• People started reading my work

• Publishing opportunities emerged

• What once seemed impossible became my daily reality

The Power of Your Words

The world will try to program you with its words until you discover that your words can reprogram your world.

Those limiting phrases—"No puedo," "No soy suficiente," "Es imposible"—feel real because you believe them. Often they come from outside sources: parents, friends, bosses, society. They want you to fit into their version of reality, not yours.

Each word you tell yourself counts. Take a moment to audit your most recurring phrases, especially those holding you back. They're actively shaping a future you might not want.

A Final Thought

As I sit here typing this from my small apartment in Madrid, watching people stroll past my window for their evening paseo, I'm reminded that we all have both the beggar and the prince (or princess) living within us.

The difference isn't our circumstances but rather what we choose to believe and say to ourselves. Dress your mind with the right words and prayers, and you transform your reality.

Remember these two powerful tools:

1. The serenity to accept what you cannot change, the courage to change what you can

2. The right words to program your mind toward your dreams

A warm embrace to you, wherever you may be reading this.